Newsletter - 7/3/22

Intro ~

Hi again beautiful human friends :) When I sit down to write/type, it’s like my body just remembers what to do. I feel so grateful to be sharing with you. My grandpa, Poppy, always used to say I was such a good writer and that I should do it more. I actually started my newsletter in 2017 because I was sending updates to my grandparents when I first moved to New York. I would include photos of my friends and share what I was up to in school and what I was discovering around the city. And here we are again, just me remembering who I am. Thank you for being along for the ride <3 How are YOU? How have you changed? 

I feel so excited for July and for the ripeness that is summer. 

Lesson Plan ~ Meeting resistance gently

When I reflect on my healing journey, there were so many moments of deep pain and sadness that needed to be felt and excavated. I’ve learned from one of my mentors, Ali, that healing is circular (not linear). So when we meet a pain point or trigger for us, the next time it comes around to say hello, hopefully it becomes easier than the time before because we can make the choice to navigate it differently. Today when I feel triggered, I greet this as an opportunity to heal more deeply instead of running away, because I know there is always light at the end of the tunnel. 

I used to do this therapy called Core Energetics, it was a somatic technique that really changed and expedited the trajectory of how I used therapy and therefore how I showed up in the world. Each week for 2-3 years, our session would start with me sharing what was coming up for me. Melissa would drop us into a little meditation in which the focus was connecting to my body, “dropping down from the mind and into the body”, she would say. I would observe that I had a pain in my right shoulder that just wouldn’t loosen, and she would have me stand up and see what thoughts came to mind after acknowledging the pain. "I think it's time to move some energy", and I would always feel so annoyed with her. So annoyed that she knew when my resistance to healing was because I just didn't want to feel the pain. 

Maybe I felt embarrassed that week because my kundalini teacher wouldn’t notice me in class when I raised my hand, and that reminded me of a time in 9th grade when my English teacher looked at me like I was crazy after I shared, what I thought was, the most brilliant thing to have been said in class that day. And this feeling of being unseen and “like I was crazy” manifested in this angry knot in my shoulder. Then she would hand me a tennis racket or pillow and would guide me through breathing exercises while I hit the object. After doing that for a few minutes (which felt like much longer than 3 minutes), I started to feel a release, sometimes deeply cathartic and sometimes subtle. I would then go into an energetic “discharge” position, like laying with my legs up the wall or in forward fold and just let everything wash away. When I returned to myself, I was transformed, every. single. time. My posture was more even, my eyes were more clear. I was always in awe of how each onion layer of my being revealed (and continues to reveal) itself. And at the end of each unblocking/awakening moment, Melissa would say “and this is why we go gently”.

Because each step is a closer remembering to who you are, to who I am. A coming home. And by going gently, you properly honor and give each part of yourself a voice to be heard or to be loved or space to cry or space to yell, whatever it is. And the more you have these little and big and medium remeberings, the more all these fragmented parts of you come back. The more embodied you become and the more you trust yourself because you know yourself and you get to know your inner voice. And this is how over the course of 4 years I have become a radically more honest and embodied person, a more True Gaby. 

When we start down this path of sifting through the mud within us, it can feel daunting and overwhelming. There is so much to look at that we don't want to see, so many parts of ourselves that we feel shame or want to pretend didn't happen. When we take one piece at a time, in divine time when they are ready, we build self trust. And we also build trust with our Creator, because we see how the more we shake loose and let go, the more we make space for magic and gratitude to fill in those cracks and crevices. 

Have you felt this before? Please share :) Next week I will be sharing about the integration of these lessons <3

with heaps of gratitude and love,

Gaby

Spark ~ 

(a few things currently sparking joy/curiosity/inspiration)

The podcast Ceremony Circle with Alyson Charles has been playing in the house and car lately. I love how she honors the deep transformations that her guests have voyaged on. There is much to learn in each episode.

For summer, I'm pining for a second Gil Rodriguez swimsuit. I purchased the white bikini summer of 2020, and have my eye on the new chocolate color to add to my wardrobe.

Another summer item, these Totême kitten heels :) I'd like to wear these with jeans and a tiny white tank top.

I'm excited about this new oracle deck that I received by Delta Venus. She is one of my favorite Instagram accounts to follow, and the deck is beautiful. Each card has a pure and potent message.

Lastly, I love the Rainbo tinctures to add to water and tea morning, noon, and night. My favorites are the Reishi and 11:11 :) Code GABYAZORSKY15 at checkout.

~ thank you thank you thank you ~ 

* see you next week, sending you beams of Reiki love through the ethers from my heart to yours *